Today started with me going outside to mow the lawn, but I couldn’t get the lawnmower going. While I was out there, I did a bit of pruning and moved a few pots around instead.
Not what I had planned, but still a bit of useful work done in the garden.
Later on, I washed the window and the curtains and hung them back up. It felt good to get that done something small but productive.
After that, the day slowly filled up with the usual mix of family time and home life.
My washing machine is dripping, the lawnmower still won’t start, there’s a hole in the roof I’m saving up to fix, and the bathroom needs a new vanity.
The locks on the doors and screen doors aren’t great either.
It’s not one big problem, it’s lots of small ones all at once, and that can start to feel overwhelming.
But I didn’t sit with it for too long.
I spent time with my granddaughter, just being together, and then later her mum picked her up.
After that I went down to my other daughter’s place, we went for a drive up to the shops.
When we got back, we had homemade ice cream and I came home with an order of Singapore noodles.
Simple things, but good ones.
Yesterday, I had a beautiful friend I’ve known for years who dropped food and flowers at my doorstep.
It meant a lot.
It made me think how lucky I am to have a friend like that in my life.
Even so, I’ve felt really exhausted today for reasons I can’t quite explain.
So I made a decision for self-care.
I put my electric blanket on, settled in, and I’m going to watch a movie on Netflix and just rest.
And then part of me looks at that and thinks, is this my Saturday night?
But maybe it’s okay that it is.
A quiet night after a full day, and a life that keeps asking for attention in too many directions at once.
So that’s where I am.
Not fixing everything.
Just pausing.
The Lady in the Back Row 